Sunday, October 24, 2010

Frights 'n' Haunts


Seriously, for some reason I love Halloween.  Ok, really, I think I like any reason to get in a costume or go crazy decorating.  I just love holidays.  But anyhow, I think the whole month of October is my favorite in some ways.  I love wearing costumes and thinking of things to dress up as.  I love partying with my friends and being the only “old people” to go trick or treating in a neighborhood.

Most of all, I LOVE the haunted mansions, houses, farms, barns and cornfields.  I love getting the shit scared out of me so badly that I can barely move my feet and feel like I’m going to wet my pants the whole time.  Sometimes, I get so scared I end up ripping the skin of the poor bastard who lets me hold on to him.

Every year, I take my boss’s son up the mountain to Moriarty, New Mexico to McCall’s Haunted Farm.  This year, I got a group of my friends to go (there was drama, but I don’t wanna talk about that).  It was scary as shit.  I thought I might die.

We went to the Haunted Corn Maze first.  The line was pretty tedious, but I was with friends, so it could definitely be worse.  As soon as we stepped foot into the maze, I knew I was an idiot for going.  I had been jumpy the whole time we were in line.  My friends kept randomly scaring me as we waited and I just knew that my heart was going to stop and I was going to be murdered inside the maze.  I gripped onto David’s hand so hard I’m pretty sure he had reason to think that his hand was broken.  I couldn’t let go and he would hold me back when things scared me more and drag me when I attempted to stop.  I screamed bloody murder at almost every turn.  I knew something was going to jump out at me.  I kept screaming, “Don’t look at them!  They won’t know you’re scared if you look at them.”  Apparently that isn’t true.  As always, I came out of the maze saying, “Every year! I do this to myself every year! Why?!  WHY!?”

There’s this guy there every year.  He’s dressed up in what I assume is a hockey jersey (I only say I assume because I never get a great look at him because I get too scared).  He carries around a creepy noise maker thingie that makes sparks and really is designed to scare me so badly that I seriously think I’m going to get killed before I leave the Farm. 

This year was the first year the creepster learned my name.  I was standing in line, kind of in a corner, next to David.  I leaned past and behind him to say something to my friend Laura when David reached behind him to “hug” me.  When I looked up, Zach was talking to the creepy guy and all I heard him say was, “…Kekky…” 

Immediately, I screamed and clutched onto David.  I was so scared.  I felt my face get hot and I was pretty sure I was tearing up some.  The creepy guy started growling my name, “Kekky…  Come here Kekky… Why are you scared?”  I couldn’t stop screaming and every time I looked around one side of David, the creepy guy would follow with his taunting.  It was like playing scare-the-shit-outta-ya-peek-a-boo for adults. 

I have no idea why the guy finally quit freaking me out, but I do know that my heart felt like it was going to pound out of my chest.  I could feel it through my arms and I could see my chest spasm with each beat.  I don’t think I’ve ever been more frightened in my life.

Every year.  I don’t know why I do it.

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