Harry

Remember my post about Kaye and her husband?  The Harry Roach?  Well, this is a bit of a follow-up to that post. 

As a general rule, I have a tendency to be far too blunt and often say the wrong thing at the wrong time.  Or sometimes the right thing at the wrong time.  But fortunately, that night, when I spoke at Kaye’s memorial service, I think I said the right thing at the right time.  After the service was over, I made it a point to give Harry a hug and give him my condolences (whatever the hell those are).  First thing he said when I approached him was, “Who are you?” 

I knew he was kidding, so I played along, “Oh, I’m Kristen Kinzer.  It’s ok you don’t remember me… You are getting old…”  I even stuck out my hand to shake it.  Then we both just started laughing. 

“Well, Kristen, I’ve thanked everyone who’s come up to me for sharing, but I want to especially thank you.  I don’t want to get too sappy, but Kaye would have so appreciated what you shared.  It was such a testament to her that the young people who she did care about were willing to come testify about her life.  It was so important that one of you got up and said something.  And even more important that it was you.  You were able to change the entire feeling in the room.  And you changed it into what she would have wanted it to be.  I so appreciate that.  I know she loved you.”

I hadn’t cried yet at that memorial service.  I was truly at peace with Kaye having passed away.  It was very much her time.  But as soon as he said that, I knew I needed to get out of there, I was going to start crying and didn’t want to do that after everything but the “social” time was over. 

I blubbered on about something, how I loved her, too and was glad I worked up the nerve to get up.  Told Harry I loved him, gave him a hug and booked it.

I don’t do well with emotion.  But more on that later.  And from the same night, I think.  That night really got to me, stuck in my gut and needs to be written about apparently.